The happiness studies (post above) always have room for more refinement, particularly as to definitions. And a sceptical commenter at Will Wilkinson's Happiness Shop has a good suggestion for further work, which he suggests might moderate his cynicism about the whole matter (he thinks people may be happy because they have never faced serious setback).
...examine how the chronically happy rebound from failure, and contrast it with the rebounds of the less happy?
The
underappreciated NLP-based Language and Behavior Profile has just such
a measure. It is not correlated with happiness, but does demonstrate
an observable continuum of rebound profiles. Some delicate souls become
sunk in misery, with no discernable handhold to pull themselves out and
a repertoire of hurt puzzlement at the very idea. At the other end of
the spectrum, the jet-pilot profile requires, at least on the job,
instantaneous recovery from mistake or disappointment. In general,
however, for health and coping, one looks for visible engagement with
the emotions of loss or worry, and a measure (a few moments when the
problem is in the past, perhaps hours or days for the real-time
experience) by which perceptible emotional equilibrium is restored.
Martin Seligman in The Optimistic Child and elsewhere also has some measures of resilience, often resulting from whether we globalize the negative (I'll never get it right! vs. Oops, that didn't work...) or the positive (Wow, what a good outcome. I enjoy success. vs. Well, for once I didn't fall flat on my face.) In fact, there's a whole resilience field aborning.
We'll
do some homework on resilience and return. But not expecting a
guarantee of attention from the chronically cynical. Why set ourselves
up for unhappiness?
Cont'd.
Today's Wall Street Journal (subscription) offers a holiday-gathering article that is about resiliency.
A growing number of researchers are putting family stories under the microscope, recording and dissecting the plots and adults' storytelling techniques to uncover links to children's development. What they're finding is that a sense of family history is linked to self-esteem and resiliency in kids. And contrary to what adults may assume, happily-ever-after tales aren't always best. Instead, stories of relatives grappling with sad or difficult events may give children the wisdom and perspective they need to thrive.
Tell
those stories from family history about challenge and survival, and
tell them again. They teach resiliency, and more. And learn something
about regional history. They're good, too.
In Austin, there is an 1855 building known as the
Neill-Cochran House Museum. The house was a residence for local
notables after its service under General George Custer as a hospital for
occupying Union soldiers after the Civil War. The stories from the
house relate that the first owner's wife was frightened to live there,
since Comanche raids in the territory had continued well into the
1840's, and their memory was fresh.
But now the house is on a tree-lined university neighborhood street, down the block from very good pizza. If children hear this story, with proper appreciation for the legitimacy of those fears of the time, they learn that she survived, the house survived, and times change. Useful lessons. Beautiful house.
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